On Fertility

Fertility is such a precious thing, such a thing that we do not even realize until we start trying to use our powers of procreation. For some, it comes sooner than others. And for those others, it’s hard. Like really hard.

Deciding to start a family is a BIG deal, like huge. And you have to really decide, and pray, and do all those things to make sure that it’s what you are supposed to be doing. And when you feel good about it, it’s GO time. And you think, YES, it’s time to get a baby in this belly. It’s my time to be a mom, and it’s my time to start a family. It’s the best feeling in the world to know that you get to create a little piece of God to have on this Earth.

And then you start trying. And it’s like you are newlyweds all over again with S alllll the time. And then a month goes by, and nothing; and then another month, and another, and still you have nothing. No positive sign on a pee stick, just a damn period that keeps coming month after month. And then you get tired. And you think, this isn’t really that fun anymore to keep trying. The trying part was supposed to be the fun part, not the forced part. And then you get worried. And you think maybe you are broken, or he is broken, or maybe you are both broken. And then you get stressed.

And people tell you not to worry about it, that it will just happen when the timing is right. So then you start worrying about not worrying, and you worry even more. Your doctor tells you to not worry about anything until it has been a year….forget the term family planning then. Talk about total defeat here. You even think of why you have been on birth control all this time to begin with, when you didn’t even really need it. Then you start hating birth control, and think that it is the thing that messed your body up. (True story, I will NEVER go on BC in a fake hormone form again).

And then you have lots of friends who tell you their stories of how they weren’t even trying and got a surprise baby, or how they only had to try one (singular) month before they got knocked up. And you secretly are bitter. And then you have friends who have been trying a lot longer than you, and would be way better parents than you anyways, so you feel bad for complaining about your measly time trying. So then, you just give up. Not give up in a bad way, but in a way that there is peace in life.

Every situation is different, and I’m not looking for comfort or to start an army against the period gods.I am finally at peace with my situation, and I know that when I do get to be a mom, I’ll have a little more appreciation for the calling that it is because I’ve had to work at it. And I mean REALLY work at it. We’ve had to pray, and we’ve had to fast, and we’ve had to cry and beg, and we’re still here, in square 1. But, it has brought us closer, and we have 3 wonderful years of marriage down, and we are happy. Last night as Dylan and I were having pillow talk in bed (not the dirty kind, the fun sleepover kind) I just realized things will be ok, and my life is perfect just the way it is (for now).So here’s to fertility, and trying, and all the S that a woman can handle (I really think I’m almost at my max here people, so if it doesn’t happen soon, I’m going to be a nun for a few months until I am ready again)

The “In”Stagram Crowd

Ok, for those of you on the bandwagon, you know what I’m talking about. Facebook and BlogSpot are now on the backburner as Instagram literally instantly gives you the ability to creep into people’s lives. Blogs are now anticlimactic for me, as my friends on Instagram have already posted that photo days before with a caption like “Getting my hair done” “On my way to ____ for dinner”. I already know what’s happening in their lives, as they do mine. So for those of you on Instagram, these photos are a thing of the past. You already know what I’ve been up to for the last month via photos and witty comments. For the others, here’s our lives in a nutshell:

For V-day we went to a Lobos game during the day courtesy of a generous co-worker who wasn’t using his season tickets. Dyl is totally in his element at sporting events, and that makes me enjoy sporting events so much more. I love when he teaches me the rules (I still don’t get a lot of the fouls and such) and gets so into the game. It’s the cutest. We ended the day getting all fancy and going downtown to a place called Slate Street Café and then to see The Vow. It was awesome (you see Channing Tatum’s butt, what more can I say?). V-day was great.

We are still waiting to hear back from UNM Med school (I’ll keep you posted on that one), I’m studying to take the GRE (keep you posted on that too), and maybe even pulled the Goalie for love making if you know what I mean. We have 2 plans laid out for the next year. Option A: Dyl goes to UNM for Med school, I take the GRE and start in the fall to get my MBA. I go down to working 2 days per week at my current job and we throw a baby into the mix sometime next year. Option B: We move to Miami and Dyl goes to Podiatry School there at Barry University (where he got a scholarship that makes tuition just as cheap as in state UNM. Go Dyl!!), I maybe go to grad school in Florida (depends on how expensive tuition is there) and maybe get a job (dependent upon when we actually have a baby) or try to find some cool work from home job which may or may not involve me getting involved in a pyramid type scheme. As soon as we hear anything on any aspect of the previous plans, I’ll keep you posted. Until then, that’ll do pig.

Honeymooners

Dylan and I have started a tradition (well it’s 2 years in the making, and depending on where we live next year/the size of our family it may not happen again) of going on vacation together as our Christmas present to each other. It may seem boring to not have anything to open up from each other on Christmas morning, but our parents still do a good job of spoiling us (especially on my side since there are no grandbabies and I’m still way spoiled). This year Dyls and I headed to the tropics again for a fun-filled (almost) week. We think it’s way fun to pretend like it’s our honeymoon for lots of reasons:

1. Room Upgrades

2. Special Treatment at hotel

3. Easier to make friends

4. EVERYONE pays attention to you (after you meet someone, they love pointing you out to various people at the resort and saying “It’s their honeymoon!!” We love it)

I guess those are not that valid of reasons, but sometimes it’s fun to live on the wild side (we obviously live a fabulous life if this is our idea of wild). We had the most wonderful time sipping on lots of sugary drinks- our hotel had a “health” bar that consisted of smoothies made of juice, full fat milk, and ice cream. Can you say milk shake? We went snorkeling one day at our hotel, only to find out that we were directly over a reef (to you this must sound amazing, and the fish were out of control amazing, but…) this also meant SEA URCHINS. I’m not into pain/risk taking, so I turned around after about 7 minutes of swimming and hustled it to the shore like whoa. I am not into getting a needle stabbed into my foot like some of the other drunken snorkelers who had impaired judgment. We ate lots of yummy food at the gourmet restaurants at our hotel- we stayed at an all-inclusive which is the way to go for us. It’s all paid for in advance, and you don’t have to take your wallet to the pool with you. I ate more nachos than I’ve eaten all year, and probably made my trainer cringe when I reported the yummies that I’d been eating. I sang karaoke at the night club because…well hey, everyone else was wasted so I was a top competitor. I ran around the room high-fiving everyone while singing “Don’t Stop Believing”. It was awesome. We visited some ancient ruins and swam at the most beautiful private beach with no sea urchins. My feet got super swollen on the last day from drinking so much diet coke and not even aqua. It was no bueno.

All in all, the week was a dream. Sometimes it so great just to get away from a week and just be Dylan and me. We had no worries, could just relax, and got a lot of one on one action together (get your mind out of the gutter). I love my husband.

PS- The pictures are HORRIBLE because we didn't have a digital camera with us. These are classic Kodak disposables...well not even Kodak, I think it was Walgreens brand. Oops.

3 years... stop it right now

I can’t even believe I’ve been married for 3 years. Sometimes I feel like we’ve been only been married for a short time, and at others I feel like we’ve been married for 10 years. Marriage is just the best, and I love my little Dylster. He has turned out to be the greatest husband (for me). Disclaimer- Everyone says their husband is the best, but it’s not true guys. We all have the best husbands for us (some of the things that I read your husbands do for you on your blogs, I would not want and I’m sure it’s vice versa)….Example: I didn’t want a fancy diamond necklace or anything huge for our anniversary (after my ring story, we all know that jewelry is NOT going to be a present given often in this family) so Dyls got me something I’ve wanted for an oh so very long time.

A pair of Nike Frees. A man after my heart…he knows how sensitive I am about my kankles and trying to reduce them. They are on their way in the mail because they didn’t have this cool color in the stores. I’m so lucky (or my husband is trying to hint that I am fat and need to lose some major lbs). Going into the our now FOURTH year of marriage, I still feel like we are newlyweds. I still love hanging out with D-dog all the time, and he’s the first person at the top of all my lists. Most importantly, Dylan is doing a great job at being the man of our home, ALWAYS praying because he thinks I take too long and letting me do all the girl stuff like cooking and cleaning. He’s just the best.

Our plans for the night include going to mutual and cubscouts, and then hitting the gym. Afterwards, we might just go for a McD’s ice cream cone and have some good old fashioned you know J

Happy Anniversary Dylly Baby. Thanks for letting me blog to the world with as many ridiculous nicknames as I want and not getting mad.

(One of) My Best Friend's Wedding

I love love love when my friends get married. Especially since I get to go in the temple and be there for the most special part of the day. Dyls is so nice and let me go to one of my BFF Rachel’swedding at the end of December. I got to go all by myself so I got to spend lots of girl time with some of my fave people. It’s crazy how much time has passes since I’ve seen these little gems:

But is seems like nothing has skipped a beat (I missed taking a pic with R.Sharp…don’t know what we were thinking). I just loved spending time with my friends, lots of laughing, lots of Café Rio, lots of gossiping, and lots of sexy pep talks for the bride to be. It was the most fun I’ve had in a long time, but a different kind of fun.

After being at weddings, I realize how much I love my husband. Not to get too mushy, but marriage is really the best. I have a partner in everything, someone super handsome to look forward to going home to, a best friend with me at all times, and the funniest other half I could’ve ever asked for. Rachel’s wedding was so sweet, the sealing was wonderful and yet so simple. That’s one of the things I love about eternal marriage so much, that is exactly what it is- ETERNAL MARRIAGE. It’s not some big fancy ceremony, it’s just 2 people getting together forever. I love it.

Rachel was the most gorgeous bride. I hadn’t seen her in almost 2 ½ years!! Our friendship was the same as always, and I am so glad I got to be a part of her special day. I’ll be back in Utah in just a few short months for a quick trip to other Rachel’s wedding, so if you didn’t catch me this time, see you in March!

Christmas Time

My house is not only looking festive on the inside but on the outside too. We got like 7 inches of snow yesterday and it's been COLD! I've almost finished all the shopping and wrapping but I had one more craft to finish tonight. I'm making these cute little flower earrings for all my young women babies. By make I mean glueing earring backs onto these flowers I bought on etsy. I'm so crafty.

Good Eaters

We had these 2 brothers over for dinner on Sunday and it was lively. We got them some new Santa hats and some Pepsi and they were more than thrilled. We sung almost every Christmas song in the hymn book and calling the radio station to request more 60s music. Classic.
We really are blessed to know these two brothers though. They are the sweetest, nicest, funniest people ever. Terry can talk sports with Dylan (we are talking memorized stats back to 1970) and jimmy is always telling me I'm a good eater:) we can't wait to have them over again on the 3rd Sunday in January. (they like to plan ahead and they get booked FAST!)

We had a snow day today

And it was awesome. UNM was cancelled and work was delayed for me then dismissed early.
Days like this bring lots of napping, cuddling, studying (for Dyls), the gym, panda express, and freezing our buns off. It's like 8 degrees outside but it feels like -3. That's cold for New Mexico people.
We don't like to use our heater because we are cheap so we use lots of blankets and even resort to beanies while indoors.
We can't wait for our vacation in a few weeks.

Snow Time

My Saturday morning run was quite chilly since it SNOWED! It snows in Albuquerque but usually not this early in December. I know what you guys are thinking, me running again? It's nothing intense but I am working out with an online personal trainer/nutritionist and I'm seeing some great results. I'll post more later.

But our Saturday was super cold and cuddly. I love those days. We went on the most gorgeous walk in the mountains sine we live like 5 minutes away. It was breathtaking. Barkley loved her life and so did Dyls. (He loves running around on the rocks acting like he's 5). The hike came to an end when Barkley jumped right into a cactus! It was bad but being the good mom that I am, I nursed her back to health within 2 minutes of the needle encounter.
Our day was finished with a trip to the groomers for Barkley and a trip to the temple for us.

The first pic is my view on my morning run. We have this great little path behind our house. The others are of our walk in the mountains.

Oh and you are probably wondering what's up with my blogging activity. I got an iPhone and it has blogger and a sweet camera on it. Plus instagram is life changing for photos.
And it's true, if you don't have an iPhone... Well you don't have an iPhone. Yeah I'm one of those people.

Terrible Twos

Barkley has decided it’s time to start acting like a two year old, literally. They say that babies are at their worst during their “terrible twos”, and I think that hits Barkley spot on right now. Our once angelic dog has turned into a little demon overnight. In the past week, she has gone to the bathroom in the house not once, but two times! In the entire time we’ve had her (almost 2 years), she’s gone to the bathroom in the house only a few times, so this is not like her at all. She has learned to tip over the trash can and eat whatever she can find inside of it this week, which is so fun to clean up. And, she thinks that Christmas ornaments are chew toys. Our normally well behaved dog is on probation right now, and if she keeps it up, we’re going to put her little bottom in the kennel when we leave the house. I mean it.

Other than that, we’re going on a little vacation in just a few short weeks. Think sandy beaches, lots of sun, and some well needed relaxation before things in our life get crazy (school for Dylan next year and a possibility of children in the near future. No, this is not a subtle announcement, we’re just thinking on it. We’ve kept Barkley alive for almost 2 years, so we might try a kid out sometime). Dylan has his UNM interview in a few weeks also, so keep your fingers crossed that one.

Other than that, we’re just getting geared up for the holidays. We had a fabulous Thanksgiving, and no, I did not take any pictures.